You and the opposing attorney or party may be very good communicators yet still not listen to or hear each other. The reason may be your communication styles may be so different that you may perceive each other as annoying or irritating which is not a recipe for negotiation success.
If you are a venter and your opponent communicates as an explainer, you may perceive them as lecturing you, belaboring a point, talking down to you or even shaming you or your client. If you are an explainer and your opponent is a venter you may perceive this as invasive, out of control and overly emotional according to Mark Goulston in a Harvard Business Review article.
Listening to the other side despite your different approaches can be a huge effort. It may trigger a part of your brain called the amygdala, whose impulse is to demanding all of your attentive listening and react reflexively with your hardwired reactions. Resisting the amygdala can be draining.
